Since all Mentors and Mentees come to relationships with different styles and expectations, one of the first things a Mentor and Mentee should discuss with each other are the rules they would like to use in their relationship. The basic rule is to make the other person feel at ease and comfortable with the relationship. This means showing kindness, flexibility, and appreciation, and using social manners. We have outlined several do’s and don’ts for Mentees that we believe will be helpful in developing a successful mentoring partnership.
Suggestions for Mentees
| Do’s | Don’ts |
| Take time to establish what you are looking for in this relationship. | Depend on your mentor to identify what you are looking for from this relationship. |
| Be considerate of your mentor’s time. Return phone calls and e-mails promptly, be on time. | Assume your mentor has unlimited time for you. |
| Listen attentively to what your mentor has to say. | Tune out when the topic seems irrelevant to your immediate needs. |
| Be complete yet succinct in your comments and explanations. | Ramble on, ignoring clues that you’re talking too long. |
| Show appreciation for assistance your mentor gives you. | Take your mentor for granted or assume he/she does not need reinforcement. |
| Make it easy for mentor to give you guidance and suggestions. | Immediately defend or explain yourself, or criticize your mentor. |
| Make only positive or neutral comments to others about your mentor. | Talk negatively about your mentor behind his or her back. |
NABFEME has set the mentor/mentee partnership time frame at 35 hours total, during a period of three (3) months. You can begin as soon as the NABFEME Mentor Partnership Program Administrator initiates the pairing and makes the assignment. We ask that your sessions be at least 10 to 15 minutes long. As the relationship progresses, session time should increase to about 30 minutes long or higher. If for some reason the pairing becomes problematic, please consult us immediately. Our direct line is (221-424-9568. For further information, we are also available at info@NABFEME.org and SheliaJenkins@nabfeme.org.